When we ask a well intentioned question like this, it often puts the emotional labor on the person you’re asking which can cause more stress. Also, it is not uncommon for many of us to not know and then have to figure not out to answer.
Here are some ideas from @revalatori to let someone know you care without putting them on the spot.
💛 Offer some insight into how you’re feeling first.
“Whew, I have been feeling a lot of anxiety lately. It has been tough but I am working through it especially with exercise. How have you been feeling?”
💛 Ask something specific.
What have you been thinking about?
How has your day been?
How does it feel to be you right now?
💛 Offer an activity to do together (and follow up!)
“Want to make a FaceTime date?”
“Want to meet at the park and go for a walk with the kids?”
💛 Be Curious!
“I’m wondering what is helping you cope right now?”
“Have you watched any good shows or listened to any good podcasts lately?”
💛 Offer Support without questions!
“I miss you! I’m just checking in. I hope you are okay. But I am here for you if you’re struggling.”
💛 Simply Hold Space
“I care about you and you’re on my mind. No need to respond. Just wanted you to know”
